


Slow Rush

by ReyNimanSolo



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Ending TLJ, CMNF, Denial, Dom/sub Undertones, F/M, Full Consent, It's Not Enemies To Lovers If They Don't Try To Kill Each Other At Least Three Times, It's Sexy AF, Master/Apprentice, Reylo - Freeform, Shaving Kink, Shower kink, Slow Burn, Touch-Starved, Voyeurism, she took his hand, surrender
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-23
Updated: 2020-06-15
Packaged: 2021-03-02 04:55:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,256
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23799625
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ReyNimanSolo/pseuds/ReyNimanSolo
Summary: Six months have passed since she took his hand. Time moves in a slow rush.~*~“Tell me why, Rey.”She’s lit up, hot and bright. Her tongue darts out to wet her lips before she answers.“I’ve never done it before, for obvious reasons. It would be my first time.”Kylo enjoys her angry vulnerability almost as much as he enjoys being the one to give her things she's never experienced before. There is still so much he has to give her, starting with this.
Relationships: Kylo Ren/Rey, Reylo
Comments: 31
Kudos: 127





	1. Initiation

**Author's Note:**

> Creativity is a strange animal. It doesn’t always land where I want it to. I welcome it each time, no questions asked.

Kylo watches her undress as he has every day since she took his hand and let it all die. Six months have passed and he can still smell the acrid stench of scorched durasteel, burnt flesh, sweet victory.

She disrobes with the same intensity she approaches everything. Whether it’s eating or fighting or bathing, it makes no difference to her. Her movements are quick and brutal and without emotion.

It amuses him that she doesn’t understand his fascination with her lack of modesty.

He hasn’t touched her beyond what is required to show her the ways of the Force but her time is no longer her own. He keeps her with him like a shadow, never free from his sight.

At night, she curls into a small corner of his room, burrowed beneath the nest of blankets she’s scavenged from his bed instead of sleeping beside him. A handful of nights ago, the nest appeared in a new spot, blankets and pillows piled closer to his bed. He wants to believe it’s a good sign.

His attention returns to her as the last of her clothing flutters to the floor in a messy heap. It’s impossible not to admire her new shape. She’s filled out, grown stronger. Her belly no longer caves with hunger but with battle-trained muscle.

The scrawny, scrappy scavenger he’d carried aboard his ship on Takodana is gone, replaced with a woman driven by a powerful purpose. Her transformation consumes more and more of his thoughts.

His breath speeds up, knowing what comes next.

Rey reaches her hands behind her head. She always leaves this part for last. Her fingers work the bands holding her hair up. It tumbles free, falling to her mid-back.

He wants to rise from his seat, wants to bury his face in her hair. Kylo knows exactly how it will smell, how she smells. He stays where he is, watching her perch on the rim of the tub. It’s the first thing he had brought in once he settled them on the _Finalizer._

Rey glares at the water before moving to stand. Both hands grip the tub’s edge. Steam drifts into the cool air. Her attention flashes to the fresher stall before she goes back to scowling at the water.

The tub had seemed a fitting gift at the time. Now, he’s not so sure. She’s about to settle her foot into the water when it hits him.

“Rey, wait.”

She scowls at him over her shoulder but doesn’t put her foot in.

“Can I please just get this over with so I can get dressed and go to bed?” she asks.

“Since when does being undressed bother you?"

"You're an idiot, Ren." She swings around until she’s perched on the edge facing him, bare as the day she was born. “I don’t care about being naked. It’s the bath I can’t stand.”

“Cleanliness is not optional.” She knows this. It’s the first thing he’d insisted on once they’d fled the doomed _Supremacy._ She'd been utterly filthy. They both had.

With the First Order in chaos, there hadn’t been time for niceties like beautiful porcelain tubs, sweet smelling soaps, and warm water. Freezing spray and the hard scrubbing of maintenance droids may have masked her tears but they’d done nothing to cool the hot blaze of her humiliation. He’d watched as she endured the harsh treatment, ready in case she changed her mind and attacked but she hadn’t.

The memory of her discomfort and begrudging gratitude still stirs his blood. If he’s honest with himself, it’s because he’s enchanted by the way she’s giving off those same feelings now. Only now, she’s undressed in his private fresher instead of on the cleaning deck of the main hangar in full view of his subordinates. And this time, he knows exactly what she wants.

The look of longing she gave the fresher a moment ago underscores her desire. It’s a startling, exciting revelation. 

The drain opens without her touching the plug.

With equal force, he pushes it back in from his place across the room. “Wouldn’t want to waste water, would we?”

At that, her signature lights up, snapping across his skin with prickling energy.

Pulse thrumming, he presses harder against the exposed nerve. “If you don’t like the bath, perhaps you’d like to try the sonic. I prefer it.”

“You’re going to make me say it, aren’t you?”

“Say what?” Kylo can’t hide his impish grin.

“You know what you are? You’re difficult. You’re a difficult man.”

He can’t help but laugh. A half-smile breaks across her face. It makes her look younger, more child-like, reminding him of when he first became aware of her. At the time, his only interest had lain in her latent Force-abilities. He’d be a fool to deny that his interest in her as a woman has reached a critical level.

He’s not laughing anymore. It takes all his restraint to keep from giving in. He is going to make her say it and then he is going to make her work for it.

“Tell me what you want, Rey, and it’s yours.”

Her smile disappears as she grows serious.

“I want to take a shower, with hot water,” she says.

He waits but that’s all she says.

“Tell me why, Rey.”

She’s lit up, hot and bright. Her tongue darts out to wet her lips before she answers.

“I’ve never done it before, for obvious reasons. It would be my first time.”

Kylo enjoys her angry vulnerability almost as much as he enjoys being the one to give her things she's never experienced before. There is still so much he has to give her, starting with this.

“Done, but not tonight. Tonight, you need to finish the bath that’s already been drawn. It would be a terrible waste of resources. I’d never hear the end of it from Hux.”

Anything worth having is worth fighting for. The more she wants it, the more exciting it will be when he gives it to her.

She glares at him before slipping over the rim into the warm pool. Gentle waves turn turbulent, splashing over the sides. By the time she’s finished bathing, the tub is nearly empty, the water spilled across the tile floor in a childish display of temper.

Kylo makes her go three cycles without bathing as punishment. He pushes with extra intensity during their training, making sure she comes away sweaty and filthy.

“Your form is sloppy, Apprentice” he says near the end of the third day. “Tired already?”

She swings at him with savage determination. It’s clumsy but powerful.

“Only tired of this old, dried up weapon.” Their blades clash in a shower of sparks. She attempts an evasive move, swearing in frustration when she cleaves a passing droid in two with her borrowed lightsaber.

“Dammit. Third one this week. This saber is almost impossible to weild.” She stands down, lightsaber deactivating with a low rushing hum. “It’s unbalanced and awful and no matter how hard I try, I can’t get it attuned to me.” Rey glares at the hilt.

Kylo’s heart speeds. He speaks before there’s time to second guess himself.

“Then, perhaps it’s time for you to build your own lightsaber.” He’s been saving this gift, the rite of passage from apprentice to equal, for the right moment. It’s an acknowledgement of her importance to him beyond his nightly voyeuristic indulgences.

Her eyes grow wide, lighting up in a way that scrambles his insides.

“Yes, Master.” She’s vibrating with excitement. It slashes across his core without mercy.

The restraint she shows allows him to maintain control of his own pent-up need. It pleases him, underscoring his assessment that she’s ready to take the next step. Like everything, he expects her to finish earning it, one completed challenge at a time.

“First things, first. You need a shower. You stink.”

She goes still, expression full of tense wariness.

"Are you serious, Ren?"

"Yes, you stink, seriously."

Rey ignores his attempt at humour. "It's okay if you want to watch." Before he knows it’s happening, she's in his space. "I want you to."

Heat prickles across his skin at her open invitation. He searches her face for any sign of trickery or deceit, finds only dark excitement.

"Please?" She's nearly in his embrace, filthy and hot. Her earthy, unwashed scent fills his head, making him dizzy with desire.

He moves away, taking her hand to lead her back to their quarters. Even though he keeps their pace slow and deliberate, their clasped hands draw plenty of stares. Until now, he's maintained a strict no-touching policy when they are together in public.

Rey follows him to their rooms and into the fresher, dirty cheeks stained pink. Her anticipation lights up the Force. She hasn't even undressed yet and he's already achingly hard.

"Go ahead. Have your shower. Unlimited water rations. Take as long as you want." He settles on his chair, hungry eyes never leaving her.

Her hand trembles when she opens the tap. She gives a little cry of surprise at the flow of water across her skin when she tests the temperature.

"It's cold." Anger fueled by disappointment boils into the Force.

"It'll be warm by the time you're undressed," he promises.

Her eyes slide to him before she begins disrobing. He crosses one leg over the other to hide his eager response. It doesn't matter how many times he watches, he never grows tired of the way she strips.

"Go ahead, try the water now," he says when she's nude.

The moment her back is to him, he swipes his palm across his lap, desperate to ease some of the ache. He bites his bottom lip and breathes into the pain to keep from making any sound.

The muscles of her shoulder bunch tight when she raises her arm to touch the water. Her delight at finding it warm sends a deep thrill coursing through his veins. He shifts against the uncomfortable seat, surprised when she draws her hand away and turns the water off.

The sudden shift catches him off guard.

"Do you think about me when you touch yourself?" She keeps her bare back to him.

The silence between them grows, broken only by the steady drip of water against tile. He pulls in a sharp breath as her meaning sinks in.

"What?" he chokes on the word. He's been so careful to wait until he's sure she's asleep.

She turns toward him, hands clenched into fists at her sides. “When you touch yourself.” He leans back in his chair as she moves into his space. “Are you thinking about me?”

Words escape him. He's completely lost control of this situation.

"Do you ever want me to touch you that way?" Her fingers flex as though they want to break free of where she holds them to her sides. Tears well in her eyes when he doesn’t speak. “Answer me. I gave up everything for you. You owe me at least this.”

"Yes."

"Yes, what?" The tremor in her voice softens the harsh tone of her words.

"Yes, I think about you, and yes, I want you to touch me.” He uncrosses his legs and leans closer. “It's all I think about.”

She draws back as though his words are a blast of unexpected fire. For a moment, he thinks she’s going to bolt. She does nothing of the sort.

“Take off your clothes, Kylo.” Brazen desire makes her eyes shine.

His breath catches for more reasons than he cares to admit. He crosses his arms over his chest and grips the hem of his shirt. There’s a brief pause while he studies her face before he bares his chest.

Her quiet inhalation inflames him. He sits still, giving her time to consider him this way. Each moment burns hotter than the last.

“I want you to touch me,” he says when the tension becomes unbearable.

"Stand up. Take off the rest." She's breathing just as fast as he is.

He stands, filling the space between them with his bulk. Instead of reaching for the fastenings holding his pants up, he reaches for the fastenings in her hair.

"Let your hair down," he says.

Her hands clamp over his wrists. "Not until you finish undressing."

She steps back as he pulls open the fly of his pants.

He pushes them down, cock springing free as he works them past his thighs. His pants puddle around his ankles, giving him room to step out and kick them aside before rising to his full height. Heat blooms across his cheeks and chest under the weight of her stare. He fights the urge to cover himself by reaching for her instead.

There are no words, only heated, shared breath while he undoes her hair. When it cascades free, he winds his fingers through the tangled strands and brings her mouth to his. The first touch of her lips against his is electric, hotter than any sun. She’s a live wire against him.

He wraps an arm around her, pulling her tight without breaking their kiss. His tongue slips between her lips as he grinds against her.

She moans and digs one hand into his back. The other touches his cheek, pushing their mouths apart.

Kylo opens his eyes, afraid she’s about to change her mind when she steps out of his embrace.

“The shower. You promised,” she says.

The balance between them shifts, giving him a renewed sense of control.

He takes his hands from her so he can put space more between them. “Go ahead. It’s yours.”

The look she gives him sizzles across his skin. Rey raises a trembling hand toward him.

“Join me,” she says. “Please.”


	2. Ignition

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Her eyes snap open, angry and full of defiance. “Give it back.”
> 
> “Control. You must learn control.”
> 
> “Not now, Ren.”
> 
> “Yes, now.” He waits until realisation dawns.
> 
> “It’s another lesson.” Reserve quiets her voice.
> 
> “Everything we do is a lesson.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m still trash, even after all these years.

The temptation is almost impossible to resist. Only the knowledge of what he can have instead keeps him from acting on his instincts. He moves closer but doesn’t take her hand. “Not yet.”

The sting of rejection pinches her expression.

He eases past her, careful to keep his skin from touching hers and turns the water back on. She vibrates in the small space left between them, breath reduced to quick pants while he waits for the water to warm beneath his outstretched hand. He fights the powerful urge to touch her the way he longs to, knowing his patience will reward him a thousandfold.

When the water is hot enough, he eases away from her. Light fingers brush across her cheek, smearing the dirt caked across her skin. “I want to watch you get in first.”

At that, she lets out a sharp breath, eyes growing darker and wider. She casts a glance over her shoulder before looking back at him.

“Go on, show me.”

She moves with the single-mindedness of someone used to scarcity, her focus only on claiming what’s hers before it’s stolen away. Unused to the dynamics of running water, she loses her balance when her bare feet meet the slick tiles. Before he can react, she rights herself beneath the warm flow of water.

The way her breath catches stops his racing heart dead in his chest.

She twists and turns beneath the spray, eyes closed against the rapture lighting her face. The pretty pink bow of her lips parts, allowing her tongue to catch the falling drops. He watches her fill her mouth again and again, swallowing mouthful after mouthful of water.

Kylo waits, tempering his desire while she drinks. When the time is right, he steps into the fresher, blocking the spray with his broad shoulders.

Her eyes snap open, angry and full of defiance. “Give it back.”

“Control. You must learn control.”

“Not now, Ren.”

“Yes, now.” He waits until realisation dawns.

“It’s another lesson.” Reserve quiets her voice.

“Everything we do is a lesson.”

“Yes, Master.” The heated urgency between them shifts up instead of down when she acknowledges her place.

Kylo slides around her to take a seat on the small tiled bench at the back of the fresher stall. The soft sound of her breath when the water hits her chilled skin makes his blood race.

“Waste not, want not. Get clean.” Caught up in his own desire to do nothing but watch, he allows her more time to indulge herself beneath the warm water without complying than is appropriate if this is to be a lesson. “Start washing, Rey.” He points to the pink cake of soap waiting in the dish near her shoulder.

Thick lather rises along her skin as she scrubs.

His hungry eyes follow the clusters of foam trailing down her breasts and across her belly until they catch in the wild thatch between her thighs.

Her stare burns where it touches the rigid length of him. “You don’t have any hair down there.”

The self-conscious curiosity in her voice thrills him beyond measure. He holds still when she moves closer to inspect him. His breath huffs out when she touches her fingers to the scratchy stubble along his cheek.

“And, this? Why does it grow here and not there?”

He catches her hand and rubs his roughened skin across her palm. “I enjoy the ritual of scraping away the reminders of yesterday. It helps me keep track of the days. And, this.” She gasps, the bar of soap slipping from her hand when he brushes light fingers over the fringe of her unruly pubic hair. “I like the way it feels without this,” he says.

Kylo focuses on her quick, panting breath to give them both time while she chooses what comes next.

“The way what feels?” she asks at last, voice edged low.

There’s been no one, other than himself, since the day she surrendered to him. Time moves in a slow rush as he fights to keep his long-held desire at bay for a little while longer.

“Sex, Rey.” He needs to know she understands exactly which direction they’re headed. “I like the way sex feels without the hair.”

Excited curiosity spikes through the Force, tugging hard against his self-discipline.

Her fingertips drift along his coarse cheek until they slip over the smooth, wet skin of his lips. “Does it feel like this?”

He nips at her fingers before drawing one into his mouth for a moment. The surprised little sound she makes excites him. “And, like this. Only better.”

She angles closer, damp skin clinging to his. “Teach me.”

His restraint grows tenuous and slick. The desire to pull her down into his lap and sink himself into her tight heat nearly undoes him. He draws a shaking breath and places a kiss against her palm before taking her hips in his hands and pushing with gentle resistance until she moves a step back.

It would be easy to use the Force to gather the things he needs. He chooses instead to step out of the fresher in a frenetic attempt to dull the savage edge of his arousal. Only when he has everything together and his pulse has cooled does he return to the fresher. The hot water stings against his chilled skin, raising gooseflesh and peaking his nipples. He holds his face beneath the spray, back to her, while he lets his skin grow warm and open.

When he’s sure, he turns toward her. She’s taken his place on the small bench, knees pressed together, hands folded in her lap to cover the wild thatch between her thighs. Her open vulnerability spikes his heart rate. He doesn’t miss the anxious way she eyes the razor in his hand.

“Don’t be afraid. It doesn’t hurt. Here, I’ll show you.”

He calls the bar of soap she dropped earlier into his waiting hand. Thick lather rises on his cheeks. When he’s satisfied, he pulls his skin tight with one hand and touches the bright edge of durasteel to the skin just beneath one ear. The blade rasps as he draws it down, scraping a clean patch along his cheek and down his throat.

She watches, her excitement bright and electric against his skin.

He rinses the blade and repeats the motion, keeping his strokes focused on one side so he doesn’t have to think about the way her breathing quickens his pulse. The fingers of his free hand slide across his face, gauging the places that still require his attention.

Satisfied, he rinses the blade in preparation for starting on the other side.

She stands, fingers curling around his against the razor’s handle. High colour marks her cheeks and flushes her chest. "Let me do the rest."

He pauses, disquiet rippling through him. His fingers clench around the razor’s smooth wooden handle. She hasn’t tried to kill him since she fired a white-hot blaster bolt into the middle of their Force connection as he’d sat having his sutures removed. They’ve been training with full battle gear for weeks and she’s never once crossed the line between their training and the deadly aggression she displayed during their earliest encounters.

Even so, this is different, more intimate and immediate. She's asking him to hand her a sharpened blade and bare his throat to her, trusting that she won't slit him open from ear to ear the moment he relinquishes the razor. Kylo holds tight, balanced on the glittering edge of full surrender.

Her fingers slip away first as she curls into herself, eyes casting down when he hesitates too long.

“Forgive me, my Master.” Her words are quiet, reverent, gaining in strength as she continues. “For overstepping my bounds and forgetting my place.”

A blue-white flicker of electricity arcs beneath his skin when she meets his stare.

“The lesson is yours to give, not mine to take,” she says.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Right. So there is absolutely the possibility of more. I only need to know you're interested.


	3. Inception

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Her arms wind around his neck, razor still clutched tight in one hand. The blade comes to rest against the pulse pounding in his throat. All she has to do is plunge it deep and pull. "I could kill you," she whispers hot into his ear. 
> 
> He turns his head, skin drawing taut against the razor's edge, until his mouth touches her cheek just beneath her ear. "I know."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Phew! This one got away from me. Probably should have split it into two chapters. 
> 
> In any case, Kylo may have gotten much more than he bargained for. This may not go the way you think. Other than the sex. After all, isn’t that why we’re all here? 😉

The water at his back sends hot needles pricking into his skin. They’re sharp reminders of his need to stay focused on what is unfolding.

Kylo balances along the thin edge between supremacy and surrender, each side battling for dominion. It boils down to whether he believes he can keep her from killing him once he gives her control of the blade. It’s easier than he expects to make his choice.

He holds the razor tight while he makes quick work of finishing his shower.

She’s quiet and still, only her eyes move. They darken as she tracks his exit from the fresher stall.

“Proof of a steady hand is the first step on the path to constructing your own lightsaber,” he says as he towels his hair dry. “Finish your shower and get out.”

While he waits for her, he rearranges things to his liking.

When she joins him, he’s already seated in his chair next to the sink. The razor rests unguarded and well within her reach on the counter. Other than the towel around his waist, he’s still undressed.

She’s also clinging to her towel. It’s bundled in her fists, the thick material balled against the apex of her thighs. Beads of water drip from the ends of her hair and trail down her skin like dew.

“Come here. Let me show you,” he says.

Her fingers blanch against the towel but she approaches him with more assurance than he expects.

He catches her bare hips in his hands when she moves too close. “Step back. Right there.” He pauses when she’s where he wants her to give her time to settle. “Give me your towel.”

She draws in a quick breath then hands him the bundle of damp cloth.

Kylo dries her hair and skin before spreading the towel across his lap. He ignores the way his heart pounds beneath his ribs as he folds the edges into one hand.

“Hold still,” he says when he’s ready.

She lets out a sharp breath when he leans forward to reach around her waist with both arms. His hands touch behind her back. He transfers the towel until he’s got an edge in each hand. It’s a simple task to drape the material over her hips and bring everything forward. She’s trapped in the sling formed by her towel.

Kylo holds tight and leans in until he feels the soft crinkle of hair against his skin. He pushes his face closer until her heat touches his nose and lips. The scent of her intensifies when the stiff tip of his tongue teases along her warm, sensitive skin.

He pulls against the towel, holding her in place when she jerks at his touch. Her hands slide into his hair, gripping tight. He licks deeper until he can taste her, thrilling at the way she grinds against him with a sweet, quiet moan.

Rey shivers when he draws back. Without looking at her, he finishes winding the towel around her waist and tucks the edge into itself so it hides the place she’s most vulnerable.

"Show me your hands," he says.

Her fingers slide free of his hair. She raises them, palms open toward him.

"Are they steady?"

Rey levels them. "Yes, Master. My hands are steady."

And, they are. She may try to kill him yet. He keeps the thought to himself. "Lather well, rinse the blade often." He finishes instructing her then eases back to wait for the sharp kiss of durasteel against his skin.

Her hands don't tremble, not exactly. It's more of a flutter in the Force. She hesitates.

He waits, then waits some more. When he's sure, he curls his fingers around her hand, the one holding the razor, and encourages her into his lap. It takes a little rearranging of her towel to allow her legs enough room to straddle him and keep it anchored around her hips.

Her arms wind around his neck, razor still clutched tight in one hand. The blade comes to rest against the pulse pounding in his throat. All she has to do is plunge it deep and pull. "I could kill you," she whispers hot into his ear.

He turns his head, skin drawing taut against the razor's edge, until his mouth touches her cheek just beneath her ear. "I know."

She trembles in his arms, warm breasts pressed to his chest. "Right now, I could do it."

The steel edge burns, poised on the brink of slicing into his skin. Kylo keeps his breath even.

“But, you won't," he says. "Because you're going to kiss me instead, then you're going to finish shaving my face. And, when you are done, I will return the favour."

The blade eases away then her mouth is on his, strong and sure. She kisses him until he’s out of breath before she slides off his lap so she has room to work.

He keeps his eyes on the razor while she does everything he’s instructed. She does a good job, never once drawing blood. Each rasp of the blade ignites a new fire inside him, especially on the trickiest parts under his nose and beneath his chin.

She does an even better job of kissing him in between each stroke so that by the time his face is smooth, she's back in his lap, her body and mouth as greedy and demanding as his.

His hands steady on her hips, seeking to calm the fire. There's still something he needs from her before they finish this in his bed.

“Put down the razor and I’ll give you everything you want.”

Rey goes still, eyes dark and unreadable when she looks at him.

She keeps one arm around his neck as she eases back so she can hold the razor away from them. Her face scrunches up before a brief flash turns the blade to dust. Rey casts the useless handle away then brings her mouth to his. Her hips rise into him, seeking the heat between them.

Rey licks into his mouth and Kylo is sure surrender has never tasted sweeter.

He undoes the front of her towel just enough so he can slip his hand between her thighs. Her skin is silk beneath his battle-worn fingers. He touches every bit of her he can until she’s panting into the crook of his neck. Kylo gathers a handful of her pubic hair, tugging gently until she gasps.

“Did you really think I only had a single razor?” he asks.

She sits up to look at him. “Of course not, Master. I’m only practicing what you’ve taught.” Her fingertips trail across his lips. “An enemy destroyed is an enemy never fought again.”

A tingling rush lights across his nerves. He pushes her off his lap before he loses himself in her allure. “Up on the counter. You can keep your towel for now.”

She hoists herself into place while he gets his spare razor and changes the blade.

He goes still when he catches sight of her. She’s draped her towel on the countertop without bothering to use it to cover herself. One heel rests on the edge of the counter. Her other leg dangles free. She spreads her knees. The aggressive posture borders on obscene. Only the tremble in her thighs betrays her.

He looks away from the ugly spectable. “Sex is new for you?” he asks.

“Not so new. I’ve done it before.”

He's not surprised though a small part of him is disappointed he isn't her first.

She yelps when he grips her raised ankle and jerks her foot off the counter until she’s no longer so open and exposed.

“You’re wrong if you think that’s what sex is,” he says as he sets the razor aside. If her crude display is any indicator of her prior experience, it bears little resemblance to what he intends.

Kylo slots himself between her legs, hands resting on the counter on either side of her hips, and kisses her. His mouth finds the side of her throat, her collarbone, lower. She shivers when he takes her nipple between his lips. He rises to kiss her again before pulling away. To do this right, he needs to approach slowly and at her pace.

"This, what we're doing, it's more than sex, Rey." He’s back at her throat, lost in the way she moans each time he presses his lips to her skin.

Her fingers dig into his shoulders, pushing until he comes up for air.

"Is it more?” She shifts between his legs until he has no choice but to look at her. “Or is that just what you tell yourself in order to justify your actions?" Her fingers trace the curve of his shoulder until they reach the rounded scar left by her lightsaber the first time she tried to kill him.

A shiver rolls through him as her fingers circle the raised edge of the mark she left upon him.

She flattens her hand against the healed wound, covering it with her palm. Her free hand comes to rest on his cheek over the scar she gave him the second time she tried to kill him. The connection between them hums to life. Absent since she fled the _Supremacy_ with him, its electricity arcs across his nerves.

"Do you tell yourself, that because you can make sex feel good for me, I should accept it without question?" she asks.

That stops him cold. "You haven't said no." Far from it, if the heat in her touch and eagerness in her kisses are any indication.

“I have no agency over whether you have sex with me or not. The only choice within my power is whether to fight or give in once you decide to fuck me.” Her eyes are bright and full of ferocity. “Just so we are clear, I have no interest in fighting you.”

It’s the last part that hits him hardest. The idea that she might not want to have sex with him is harsh enough. That she’s resigned to giving in without a fight regardless of her wishes stuns him to stillness.

Rey wraps her legs around his waist, keeping him close as though she knows his instincts are screaming at him to move away. "You haven't given me an opportunity to say no."

It’s been a long time since anyone said no to him. It’s been even longer since he gave anyone a choice in the matter.

"You also haven’t given me a chance to say yes." Rey’s hand leaves his cheek to curl around his nape. “Shouldn’t something as intimate as having sex be a decision we make together?"

The prospect is thrilling and comes at the cost of bruising uncertainty. For all her cues that tell him she’s interested, he’s deeply unsure whether she’ll say yes if he gives her the choice. By his measure, he’s under no obligation to do so. He is the Master, she the Apprentice. The lessons are his to give as he pleases, when he pleases.

Still, to know she’s willing. The shift is monumental.

“As long as I remain your Apprentice, sex will be nothing more than you fucking me. Only when we are equals will it become something more.” The hand at his nape pulls until their foreheads touch. For the first time since she placed her hand in his, Rey lets him slip across the edge of her mind.

She’s always been there, his Light. If he closes his eyes he can feel it, feel her, his everlasting Light in the darkness. When he’d killed Ren and taken up the mantle of Kylo Ren, she'd been there, felt the stinging cold of the dark side rising even under the oppressive heat of the Jakkuvian sun.

And the stark, desolate cold of Starkiller, where physical restraints had meant nothing to her. He hadn’t been the only one to feel the searing pain of loss when he’d plunged his saber through his father’s heart. As deep as he digs, Rey digs deeper, calling out his greatest fears, meeting him time and again despite her vulnerable position.

The floodgates open, unleashing a torrent of memories. A phantom bolt from her blaster the third time she’d tried to kill him. The melancholy sound of waves crashing against ancient cliffs. Her sorrowful eyes when he’d admitted to being a monster and she’d found him worthy enough to come to him and fight at his side against the things he feared most.

_You’re not alone_

"Do you see?"

He does and it takes his breath away. Darkness rises and Light to meet it. It’s the one truth that has never wavered.

"Do you love me, Kylo?" she asks.

Everything’s tight and close, laid so bare he can hardly breathe. He’s shaking, open and vulnerable when he speaks his next words. "For as long as I can remember."

She drops her legs from his hips and pulls him the rest of the way in until they’re gliding, gentle and smooth, into a slow kiss. Her tongue is soft and sweet against his. She’s warmth and light beneath his touch.

The hand at his nape slides down, the calloused skin of her palm dragging across his chest as she moves it lower. Her fingers tease at the edge of his towel.

He grabs her hand to keep her from stripping him and pulls his face out of range, a drowning man gasping for air against the rising tide. “Say you love me too, or we stop now.”

"We both know there’s no stopping this.” She eases her hand from his grip. Light fingers trail up his ribs until her palm flattens against his skin. "I want to touch you the way you touch yourself in the darkness of our room. I want you to cry out my name into my ear when you come and not into your pillow. I want to be beside you, always.”

Her words rush to his head, thrilling and hot.

“Then, say it. Tell me you feel it, too.”

“I do.” Rey draws him closer, pausing just before their lips meet. “Be with me.”

Before he can reply, her mouth finds his again. She’s light in his arms when he scoops her off the counter without breaking their kiss.

He carries her into his room, razor all but forgotten.

She holds tight, pulling him with her when he tries to set her down in his bed. They sink deep, his weight heavy on her for a brief moment before she rolls him onto his back.

He lets out a breath as she slides across his hips, seating herself above him. His hands come to rest on her hips. Their movement has loosened her towel.

“Take it off,” she says.

It’s easy to strip the material from her. This time when he rests his hands on her hips, he touches smooth, bare skin instead of nubbed cloth. Kylo runs his palms along the violin curve of her waist, marveling at the warm strength beneath his hands.

She stops him before he reaches her breasts.

“Now, you.” Rey rises off him to give him enough space.

Kylo holds still, lost in the image of her in this moment.

“Gone shy, have you?” she asks when he hesitates too long.

He shakes his head. “No, just not ready to stop looking at you yet.” His eyes follow the path of her rising blush. “You’re beautiful.”

She squirms in his grip. “And you’re still entirely too dressed for the occasion.” Her fingers pluck at his towel. “Come on, now. Off with it.”

"I want you to do it for me." A surge of heat spreads across his skin at the change in her expression.

Perfect little teeth dig into her bottom lip while steady hands make short work of stripping him. He raises his hips just enough for her to pull his towel free. It lands on the floor with a dull thud.

Rey eases down until she's seated low across his thighs. She drags her fingers along either side of his cock but doesn't touch. Need makes him thicken and rise until he's fully erect.

Kylo's desires slip free of his hold. He can't stop himself from projecting. Rey's eyes widen and Kylo knows for certain she hears his thoughts.

Her hands go still against his skin. "Do you mean it?" she asks. "You'll not turn this into another lesson in denial?"

He twines his fingers through hers, pulling her down close as he stretches his arms toward his shoulders.

Rey pushes his hands into the mattress. She stops before their bodies touch, hovering just above. A tingling blanket of energy sinks into him, weighing him down. It’s not a tight hold. He could move if he really wanted to but he doesn’t. Her message is loud and clear. She wants him to stay right where he is.

Silky hair cascades around him, the strands forming a tunnel until all he can see is her face.

"Answer me, Kylo."

“Let me up and I’ll show you.”

“And, if I say no? You’ll stop?”

“I’ll wait, but you said it yourself. There’s no stopping this.” Now that he knows what he has to do, he’ll accept nothing less. “No matter if you say yes or no, you have no choice but to let me up.”

The weight of the Force slips away leaving bare, naked space between them. He turns his face away when she tries to kiss him.

“Nothing else happens until you’ve let me up.”

“I haven’t decided yet,” she says.

Kylo meets her eyes. “I have. Let me show you. Please.”

Rey takes her hands from his and sits back on the bed, well clear of him.

Without bothering to cover himself, he heads into his living space where his desk sits. The chair protests under his weight when he drops into it. Blood pounds in his ears. The gravity of what he’s about to do sends a cold rush of trepidation singing through his veins.

The item he came for waits alone in an otherwise empty drawer. He hasn’t touched it since the moment he locked it away. To this day, he’s unsure how his mother managed to give him possession of it. The power of all it stands for gives it a weight he can feel deep within.

He unlocks the drawer, half expecting a bright beam of light to radiate from the interior when he opens it. There’s only darkness instead. His fingers tremble as they disappear into the void. He feels around the smooth surface searching for the small item. There's a brief moment of panic when he thinks the drawer is empty before his fingertips brush across cool metal.

He draws it into his palm and closes his fist around it. It takes a moment before he can bring himself to open his hand and look. For all its delicate fragility, there’s immense power in its form and shape.

“Kylo? Are you coming back?”

Even from the other room, he can hear the waver in her voice. He takes one last look before closing his fist again. Quick, determined steps bring him back to her.

She’s sat on the edge of his bed, a sheet wrapped around her. The look on her face verges on tears.

He shushes her when she starts to speak. “Wait, please. Let me finish first.”

She takes a shuddering breath then nods her head.

Kylo settles at her feet, legs folded beneath him. He’s almost as tall as her, even so. A quick sleight of hand transfers the item into his fingers so he can hold it up.

Her eyes grow wide when she catches sight of it.

“My grandmother’s ring, given to her by Anakin Skywalker the day they wed in secret. I want you to wear it, as Empress, only our marriage will not be secret. I want the entire galaxy to know we are one. Say yes and it will all be yours.”

His breath hitches when she unwinds the sheet and bares herself to him once more. He's caught by surprise when she slides off the bed into his lap. The unexpected move throws him off-balance. He’s too busy trying to keep from dropping the ring that he can’t stop her from kissing him. His free arm winds around her waist, holding tight as he rights them.

Her fingers tangle in his hair, keeping him in place so he can’t get away. It takes supreme effort to hold onto the last of his restraint under the heat of her kiss. He hangs on, waiting for the inferno to die back. At last, her mouth turns languid against his giving them both room to breathe.

She moves against him. The warm slide of her skin rushes through him until he’s aching and hard once again. Her tongue dips into his mouth each time she rises against him. She turns serpentine in his arms.

Kylo groans, fingers digging into the taut muscles of her backside to guide her along his length. Each pass edges him closer to the point of no return. On the next downstroke, he tightens his grip, holding her in his lap so she can’t rise. He buries his face against the side of her neck, fighting for control. The brief respite gives him just enough time to gather his strength against the bright promise of release.

"For the love of R’iia, if you're going to turn me down, do it now."

Rey eases him back until they’re looking at each other. She watches as he takes her hand and guides the ring closer to her finger. He stops before it slips over the end. Her eyes linger on the ring for a moment before she meets his look.

The reason for her hesitation dawns bright and clear. She’s waiting for one last assurance, the only one left that means anything.

His pulse spikes, making his heart rabbit beneath his ribs. He wraps his arms around her, holding her close. “Will you marry me?”

Her expression softens, misting her eyes. She touches his face with gentle fingers.

He closes his eyes, afraid to miss any of the sensation for fear it will be the last time she touches him.

“Yes.” The word drops into the still waters between them, setting off an unstoppable wave.

Kylo opens his eyes just in time to catch her expression before she’s kissing him again. The ring waits, forgotten for the moment. She rides up in his arms, eager and warm. Rey glides higher with each pass, seeking the end of his considerable length. Fresh slick eases the friction between them.

Gasping breath marks the moment his cock notches against her tight heat. Kylo grips hard to keep her from sinking onto him. “Wait. The ring.”

Instead of waiting, she bears down. He has no choice but to subdue her with the Force.

“Take the ring, first.” His arms tremble with the effort of holding her back. _“Please.”_

She tenses then slackens. He uses the opportunity to hoist her onto the edge of the bed and take her hand. A torrent of memories races across his mind as he slips the ring onto her finger. It slides into place, a perfect fit. Her arms wind around his neck.

He grips the bed on either side of her hips and rises between her thighs. It’s his turn to kiss her. Her lips part when he brushes his mouth over hers. She lets him in with a quiet moan. He waits until she’s panting between kisses to ease her back on the bed, one hand planted against her ribs.

She props herself on her elbows, giving him a clear view of her. He runs his hands along her body. His thumbs meet at the apex of her thighs. He caresses the creases where her legs meet her body, pulling at the skin until she splits open.

Her head falls back when he drags his tongue over her flushed, parted folds. He pauses at the top, giving extra attention to the stiff little knot he finds. Her fingers tangle in his hair. She uses the leverage to hold him close while she grinds against his face. He goes as far as he can without air before pulling away.

Her fingers dig into his shoulders for purchase. “Don’t stop.”

Kylo pulls her close. A deep thrill runs through him when he eases his tongue into her mouth. There’s no way she doesn’t taste herself on him. He breaks away with a needy groan. “Get into our bed.”

For a moment, he’s sure she’s going to protest. She moves away instead until she’s squarely in the center of the bed. A fresh wave of excitement ripples through him when she offers him her hand.

“Come here,” she says.

He climbs in after her, mouth chasing hers. Her thighs part to accommodate the wide expanse of his hips. She welcomes the weight of him with a quiet sigh.

“Kylo—”

“Shh.” He presses his mouth to hers to keep her from finishing.

Her arms and legs curl around him, holding tight.

He eases one of her arms from around his neck so he can draw back enough to look at her.

“Do you trust me, Rey?”

The pad of her thumb glides across his parted lips. “Yes.”

He dips his head until his mouth touches the shadow beneath her collarbone. Her hips rise in response. She turns her cheek against the pillow when he trails kisses across the slim column of her throat.

“Kylo, please.” She’s breathless with need.

Encouraged, he slides his cock through her slick channel, mouth nuzzling against her throat. “Please, what?”

She arches into him. Her fingers dig into his shoulders, pushing him down. “Please, your mouth. Like before.”

His hands settle on her hips as he glides down her body. Her stomach caves with each touch of his lips against her skin. The Force hums to life, prickling and hot around him when he places a kiss below her navel.

“Easy.” He waits until her grip relaxes to press his lips to her hot centre. His hold on her tightens against the rise of her hips.

She groans and presses closer, hands tangled in the bedsheets. Her thighs fall open in invitation.

He licks a long, slow stripe over her flushed skin, paying special attention to the pearl at the top before starting again. He laps at her with his lips and tongue, listening for the right moment to brush his fingertips across her opening.

“Oh, gods.” Her thighs snap closed against his ears.

He goes still, waiting until her grip on his head eases enough to untangle himself from her legs. She might be ready but he’s not, not yet. He lays next to her, chest pressed to her side. His fingers trail across her skin, tracing the line of her abdomen until they disappear into her public hair.

Rey rolls into his touch, breath hissing. Her fingers dig into his forearm.

Kylo pulls free of her and takes her hand, guiding it to his cock. A tremor rolls through him when her hand closes around him, warm and tight.

She gives him a tentative stroke, then another.

He groans in response despite the growing discomfort of dry friction each time she draws him through her fist. Pain mixes with pleasure bringing him quickly to the edge.

She releases him without warning. Cool air rushes over his flushed skin as she rolls away. Before he can ask where she thinks she’s going, she stretches her hand over her head, reaching for the knob on his bedside table.

Heat flushes his cheeks when he realises what she’s after.

Her hand digs in the drawer before coming up with the little black bottle he keeps for just such an occasion. Rey’s eyes meet his, going wide for a moment before she lets out a series of giggles. “You didn’t really believe you were hiding it, did you?”

Her laughter fades when he doesn’t answer. The cap opens with a quiet snap.

He sucks in a sharp breath when the cool liquid touches his skin. His breath becomes a groan as the warm heat of her hand glides down his full length. At the base, she drags up, slow and agonising, until he slips free of her grip. She’s back on him, stroking without pause. It takes no time at all before the tingling rush of impending release steals over him.

He stills her hand and rolls onto his back. Kylo encourages her toward him when she hesitates. “Sit on my lap. That’s it,” he says when she settles low across his thighs. His cock is thick and heavy against his stomach.

She gives up the bottle without a fight, eyes bright as she watches him slick his fingers. Her back arches into his touch when he draws his fingers between her thighs. Small hands dig into his thighs for leverage as he touches her until she’s rocking in his lap. She reaches out, fingers sliding up his length until she has him in her grip.

Kylo stops touching her long enough to grip her backside in both hands. He uses the leverage to ease her off his lap then wraps one hand over hers around his cock so he can angle himself into position.

Rey shifts until she’s balanced over him. Her lips part with a quiet gasp when his thick, flared head pushes into her. He holds her steady, her hips in his hands, until she’s ready for more.

Both her hands dig into his thighs while she catches her breath.

White heat sears across his skin as she sinks further onto his cock. It’s nearly enough to make him come and she’s only halfway.

She’s breathing hard, a fearful look on her face.

He brushes loose strands of hair off her cheek. “It’s okay, you don’t have to take it all.”

Rey whines at the light brush of his fingers against her pubic hair. She sinks deeper onto him when he runs the pad of his thumb through her slick folds.

Kylo bites his lip to keep from losing control. He uses the hand on her hip to urge her back up. His eyes squeeze shut against the electrifying slide her body on his. She shifts direction before he expects it, taking more of him this time and Kylo knows for certain he isn’t going to last. His fingers dig into her hips in a last, desperate attempt to hold on.

“Rey, I can’t...” His orgasm sweeps away the rest of the words in a blinding vortex. When his vision returns he finds himself still clinging to her while she rides him.

He’s still hard in spite of his orgasm, his cock sensitive to the point of pain. “Easy.” His hands tighten on her hips, slowing her pace. “Slow down so I can touch you.”

Kylo groans when she sinks all the way down and stays in his lap. He circles the pad of his thumb across her most sensitive skin until she’s moaning and rocking into his touch. She whines when he gives his hips a gentle thrust. His come adds a new layer of slick between them.

She tightens around him with a quiet moan. Little tremors course through her each time he touches. He feels her approaching the edge. It’s in the way her breath becomes a series of sweet little ohs and her body flutters around him. Two gentle thrusts is all it takes to send her over.

Kylo groans and sits up, drawing her into his arms as she comes on his cock, her breath hot against his skin. He holds tight, giving her time to return to him.

At last, the tension eases from her body. He holds her closer, one hand stroking her back until her breath slows enough for him to kiss her. Her mouth is tentative, almost shy. He stops when she doesn’t return his kiss.

He tilts her chin up, sees the tears staining her cheeks.

Rey yips when he eases her off his cock.

“What’s wrong? You’re not hurt are you?” He checks her thighs for blood, relieved when he finds none.

She sniffles and shakes her head. “I didn’t know,” she says in a shaky voice. “I thought I did but I was wrong.” Her fingers touch his lips. “Is it always like this with you?”

His eyebrows pinch together in confusion. “Is what always like this with me? Sex?”

The high colour already in her cheeks flushes deeper. “Yes. Is it? Because I've never...that's never happened to me before.” She manages to finish her sentence though her voice has dropped to nearly a whisper.

He can’t keep the gentle smile from his face. “You had an orgasm, Rey. It’s perfectly natural during sex.”

“Does it happen every time?”

“Not always, but it can with practice.”

She rises into him, mouth hot and eager on his. “Can we do it again? You know, for practice.”

Kylo chuckles before he answers. “Of course.” His cock, soft from their recent activities, twitches when she grinds against him.

“Right now?” Her quickened breath and frenzied kisses speed his heart.

“Ready again so soon?” he asks.

“Yes. Kylo, _please.”_ Her hands are everywhere as though she’s afraid he’ll say no if she stops touching him.

“Would you like to try something different this time?” he asks, knowing it will take him longer the second time.

She stops long enough to give him a questioning look. “Will you make me come?”

His smile returns and with it, a promise. “Without a doubt, as many times as you want.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for riding along! I hope you enjoyed this as much as I did ❤

**Author's Note:**

> Be safe, remain healthy, and may the Force be with you, always.


End file.
